Prison Visiting...

Nigh on three weeks have passed since my last posting – three weeks which included a day of wearing black (and not in a GOOD way) to “celebrate” the dreaded day when MummyRat turned 50 years of age. One good thing – none of the rats appear to mind that they are now being tended by a person of considerably advanced years, and who can now officially wear a purple skirt twinned with an orange blouse and a red knitted hat and nobody will think any the less of her since such colour schemes are clearly expected.

These three weeks have seen the introduction of Data, Worf, Flack and Hawkes into Rat Towers, the re-introduction of Colin back into the fold (still with a sore hand but bored out of what few wits he had in the hospital cage) and the imprisonment of LB into a cage on his own. Malone spent two nights in Rat Towers before MummyRat decided that he was Looking Frail and needed to be spoiled and made much of in the hospital cage, so he’s now being nursed and given lots of lovely tit-bits by his ever-loving Mummy. He really doesn’t seem to mind being alone so nobody is suffering from his being on his own in hospital – for approximately six nano-seconds I considered putting Nurse Grissom into hospital with Malone as a Carer but Grissom (who is very well-attuned to his adopted female parent’s thoughts) took to the hills and is still in hiding somewhere, holed up and being smuggled supplies by the four babies. The only time he deigns to appear in public is when I’m giving out treats, and when he wants a cuddle – Grissom is an extremely cuddly rat, and appears to trust me now not to put him into hospital. Malone is happy, so I’m leaving the status quo alone.

The Imprisoned One, however – now this is a different story altogether. I was labouring under the mis-illusion that once I managed to get LB on his own I’d be able to spoil him into becoming a friendly, sunny-personalitied rodent. I held this opinion for at least four days – four days that saw me daily putting my hand into the cage and stroking LB carefully and gently.. three of these days this worked very well and I was convinced that LB could be saved for the population of Rat Towers. However, day four was a totally different story; hand went into cage, as usual – LB allowed approximately three strokes before turning on me and giving me several really nasty bites. I should have known what to expect when I saw a bottle of nice Chianti opened and breathing in the cage and the book “Hannibal’s top 100 recipes” open to page 4 – “Human Finger Food”. That was the last time I stroked LB, and the last time I ever really want to have contact with him since there was absolutely no reason for such vicious behaviour – when he’s cleaned out he’s placed in his cage into the big “cleaning out” cage, with the roof taken off and allowed to effect his own egress – cage is then removed, cleaned and replaced and LB goes back in in his own time. Feeding him is now a matter of never letting the hand come between teeth and Thomas the Tank Engine cup containing the food. Maybe it’s Thomas that he has an aversion to – I’ll never know since I’m not a rat psychiatrist and LB himself doesn’t appear to want to share.

However, during the three days when LB was actually being nice (such lovely days) there was in Interesting Incident where LB won some definite brownie points. I got up (early, as always) and went to look at my boys – spotted that LB’s cage (on the bottom of the stack of two with Malone in the Hospital cage on top) had its front door wide open and no LB present. Furniture removal, frantic search and much sweating and swearing ensued. I moved the settee twice – no mean feat since it’s a large leather four-seater job – but no LB behind it… however, the movement of said settee maybe disturbed him from his hiding place because I spotted him strutting determinedly across the room towards his cage, tail stiff and nose a-quiver. He entered the cage, practically closed the door behind himself and sat and ate some food since he was Starving After Having His Adventure.

LB’s cell is now held close with a nappy pin…..